Habits explained part 5: Reward

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In the mini-article, Habits explained part 4: Routine/Response we discussed how to structure routines/responses. We repeat what is immediately awarded and we avoid what is immediately punished, this is why the last step in the habit loop is the reward. In this short article, we discuss how to make use of the reward mechanism for your benefit. This series explains habits and how to detect, change or establish new and better habits.

When we try to build or change our habits we are often looking for long term benefits. Unfortunately our brain is still wired in a way that it is focusing on immediate benefits or punishments. That means if we want to introduce new behaviours we need to find ways to make them immediately rewarding. Contrary if we want to stop negative behaviours from repeating we need to make them immediately painful.

Tactics to make habits rewarding

The most important part in making a habit attractive is finding ways to associate success or rewards immediately after the desired habit. There is no need for big rewards, small incentives are completely sufficient. Once established it is also a good idea to not always reward yourself as the effectiveness of a reward will wane over time. The below tactics worked pretty good for me. Sometimes I also combine them:

  • Reinforcement
    • Reinforcement means the idea to invent or identify a reward or small pleasure that you can treat yourself with after a habit is done.
    • Examples:
      • Want to shop less and save more → Every time you avoided shopping, move some money in your savings account
      • You went to the gym → Treat yourself to a nice coffee, a new book, a manicure etc.
      • You meditated in the morning → Get your first cup of tee or coffee (works for me, depends on what you like ;))
      • You did the 10 sales calls after the lunch break → Read the news that you wanted to read for 10 minutes / Take a nice short walk to relax…
  • Habit tracking
    • Habit tracking is my favourite as it is simple and effective and fulfils several tasks at once: It makes a habit obvious, attractive and satisfying.
    • The best way to track a habit is through visual cues such as
      • Crossing days off of your calendar
      • Moving items from one bowl to another (example: one glass with paperclips and one empty → every time you make a call you move one paperclip to the other)
      • Use an app
    • Visual cues give the impression of progress and this motivates
    • It is important that you try not to break the chain, if it happens ok, but don’t let it happen twice in a row 😉 Otherwise we are talking about a new habit
  • Accountability
    • Being held accountable by another person you like or maybe a community is another powerful motivator.
    • Examples:
      • Agree for with a person that you send them everyday a WhatsApp when you finished your morning meditation. Your accountability partner ideally gives a positive response back, such as “awesome”.. You can also add pain to the equation, by making a “contract”. Every time you fail you have to buy your accountability partner a coffee etc…
      • Look for online communities that are supporting habit development and post your new habit and provide regular updates. Some habit trackers have these communities built in.
      • Join a club that foster your habits: Sports club, reading club…

Tactics to make habits unattractive

We as humans try to avoid pain, and often go to great lengths to do so. Therefore the key to breaking bad habits is making them as unattractive and painful as possible. The two things that worked for me are:

  • Negative reinforcement / making it unattractive
    • Highlight the negative aspects of the bad habit every time you do it. For this to work you need to realise you did the habit and immediately think of the negative consequences.
    • To give you an example that I used (sounds maybe extreme but worked well 😀 ): Every time I eat sweets despite trying not to, I immediately go to google with my phone and look up stomach cancer or other deceases that I think could be related to unhealthy food.
  • Accountability
    • The most effective way to introduce pain to a habit is to make a so called accountability contract.
    • This is an agreement between your accountability partner or maybe even an app such as StickK (a platform that let’s you donate money if you fail to stick to a habit). Ideally it is a formal agreement and you really make a kind of contract that everyone takes it serious. In it you formulate a punishment for you if you repeat a habit you do want to get rid of.
    • Examples for punishments:
      • You want to get fitter and decide to have a daily run. If you fail to do so, you need to dress up everyday despite working from home.
      • You want to stay in touch with your parents, and decide to have at least a weekly call with your mom & dad. If you fail to do so you donate 200 € (or whatever hurts) to an institute of your choice.
      • You want to read daily. If you fail you have to give your TV to your sibling for a month.This is the end of the mini series: Habits explained. What I learned over time is that it is a good idea to try to build habits that fit to your personality. For example if you want to get fit but absolutely hate going to a gym and lift weights, then maybe running, cycling, swimming, playing soccer or rock climbing or any other physical form of movement is more your cup of tee. Find what works for you and is enjoyable.

This is the end of the mini series: Habits explained. What I learned over time is that it is a good idea to try to build habits that fit to your personality. For example if you want to get fit but absolutely hate going to a gym and lift weights, then maybe running, cycling, swimming, playing soccer or rock climbing or any other physical form of movement is more your cup of tee. Find what works for you and is enjoyable.